Radio Heard Where?

Did you know that on the same day that Clear Channel culled 1,500 radio employees, Bose, the high-end radio manufacturer, laid off 1,000? The reason? No one’s buying radios anymore.

So, let’s read the room and ask this question: Could anyone choose a more inappropriate time than the National Association of Broadcasters (NAB) and the Radio Advertising Bureau (RAB) did to jointly release their 2008 year-end report?

Let’s be thankful that neither David “Fumbles” Rehr, President/CEO of the NAB nor Jeff “Ka-Ching” Haley, President/CEO of the RAB were in charge of a cable film channel in 2001. They would’ve scheduled The Towering Inferno the day after 9/11.

The report claims that their cooperative Radio Heard Here campaign is “an unprecedented, comprehensive initiative to reposition radio for a vibrant and successful future” and that it's “off to an incredible start."

Impressive. Fumbles and Ka-Ching must’ve graduated from the same “how to be mendacious” class as Lyin’ Diane Warren.

You’ve seen those much promised Radio Heard Here billboards, haven’t you? How about those colorful full-page Radio Heard Here print ads? I’m surprised that servers throughout the U.S. haven’t crashed considering the heavy traffic the Radio Heard Here streaming audio web site is receiving.

I have no problem with these two being loyal to their cause, but it shouldn’t require having them check their brain at the door.

Let’s review the Radio Heard Here report:

Technology: We sought to promote the expansion of new technology and increased integration with devices like digital music players and mobile phones.

Just because streaming audio is going mobile doesn’t mean its users are listening to terrestrial radio streams. In fact, just the opposite is true. It’s opened a – pardon the pun - Pandora’s Box for Internet radio listeners.

Content Diversity: We encouraged new innovations in programming.

How many more times can one homogenize, pasteurize, and de-contentize radio and expect it to survive through the next decade?

Let’s see. Clear Channel is moving toward fifteen nationally programmed formats and escalating its dependence on nationally syndicated programming and multiple market voice-tracking. Is that what’s meant by “less is more?” CBS Radio and Citadel collectively fired over 1,000 employees last year and now rely on increased automation and syndicated programming. That translates to less content and diversity. Click here to check out CBS’s Fred Jacobs-consulted jockless and robotic “Radio” (yes, that’s what they call it) format. How innovative!

Education: We agreed to increase education within the industry and among advertising professionals and other influencers.

The education ad pros are getting on radio comes from Arbitron. To paraphrase Pete Seeger - where have all the average quarter-hours gone?

Consumer Engagement: We aimed to engage consumers and increase awareness of the personal, emotional connection that listeners have with radio.

Judging from Arbitron and other sources, consumers are disengaging from radio.

Then there’s HD Radio.

Let Fumbles and Ka-Ching talk the talk: As this report is being published, we’re witnessing an avalanche of new radio-related technology announcements coming out of the Consumer Electronics Show 2009. HD plays a significant role in radio’s advancement of technology. HD is available from a growing list of traditional as well as online retailers and it is offered as standard equipment or an option on an increasingly robust list of new vehicles. As a result of this and HD advertising efforts, consumers are learning more about the benefits of HD technology and embracing it.

When Radio Shack stops selling HD Radios its over. They stopped selling HD Radios. It’s over.

Bob “Booble” Struble and Lyin’ Diane Warren haven’t figured out that robbing isn’t the toughest part of heisting. The getaway is. That’s what separates the pros from the cons.

More from the report: At a panel discussion in Los Angeles in January, Jeff Smulyan Emmis chairman and CEO said, “We’re not hiding from new technology, we’re driving it. One of the hottest-selling features for the iPod is an FM tuner.”

I went to the Apple accessories page. No such animal. I called the Apple retail store. The clerk never heard of it but asked if I meant the accessory that would allow me to listen to my iPod on a car radio. That one is a big seller. When asked the clerk if anyone else had ever asked about an AM-FM radio accessory for an iPod he said “no.”

Still more: The Microsoft Zune made news when it introduced its “buy from FM” feature enabling users to discover, tag and purchase songs directly from its built-in FM radio. Nine of the country’s leading radio broadcasters committed to broadcasting programming on FM stations that include song tags. Every Zune portable media player allows consumers to wirelessly download or stream songs on the go from wireless hot spots around the country. “Radio is one of the primary ways people discover new music, which is why we have built an FM tuner into every Zune portable media player,” said Chris Stephenson, general manager of global marketing for Zune at Microsoft. “The leadership of these radio broadcasters has played an integral role in enabling millions of Zune users to tag and purchase songs directly from FM radio.”

One problem. Zune is history. That’s from Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer. He admitted that Zune will be phased out and the brand, if it does survive, will be a feature of Windows Mobile rather than in Microsoft-designed hardware.

The NAB and RAB have earned a reputation for hitching their wagon up to the wrong horse time after time.

Their Radio Heard Here report was seasoned with quotes from industry cheerleaders on how healthy the radio industry is. Too bad cheerleaders don’t win the game. The players do. And where are they?

What the report did was convince me that the NAB and RAB exist in a world where the nuts hunt the squirrels.

Now, let me draw your attention to a report you must read. It’s from the Center for Sales Strategy and titled Why you might not make It. It’s direct, to-the-point and illustrates why the present sales course taken by Clear Channel, CBS Radio, Citadel, and others will fail.

The one question every one in our industry should ask: When we finally hit bottom and begin to climb out of this economic black hole, will radio still be viable?