Monday, December 15, 2008
Media: Bush's broken Boy Toy
You’re Boy Kevin Martin. You’re living in the waning days of the Bush Administration and your reign as Chairman of the Federal Communications Commission is coming to a disgraceful and bitter end.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and you’ll be forever known by your new acronym for the FCC – Federal Communications Crook. You wear it well.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and you turned the FCC into your own personal hackapalooza. Under-the-table deals were your specialty.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and you offered your own personal directory of preferred lobbyists to anyone wanting to buy in.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and you should’ve known the end was near last May when the General Accountability Office ratted out your less than fortuitous leaks of confidential material to certain lobbyists and companies.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and you responded to their accusations by claiming your only motive for passing along confidential information to those that benefited from the inside information was strictly a courtesy. They were simple timelines to your inner circle on when to prepare their lobbyists and other assorted influence peddlers to descend on Congress. Translation: It always helps to know which palms need greasing and when.
You’re Boy Kevin and you have the same motto as Jerry McGuire – Show me the money.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and you forgot the one rule that applies how business is done whether you’re a politician, a crook, or both: Never write if you can speak; never speak if you can nod; never nod if you can wink.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and you believed in running the FCC on the down low. Above the law, below the radar.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and when Rep. John Dingell (D-MI), who chairs the House Committee on Energy and Commerce, threatened to investigate the improprieties uncovered by the GAO, you had that irritating professional letter-writer, whiny speaker, radio/TV industry yes man and CEO of the National Association of Broadcasters, David “Fumbles” Rehr prepare an officially sanctioned “Defend Boy Kevin” campaign.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and you had to know the walls were closing in when the HCEC sent you a letter requesting e-mails, memos, handwritten notes, and meeting schedules for the last three years. It said their investigation was linked "to management practices that may adversely affect the commission's ability both to discharge effectively its statutory duties and to guard against waste, fraud and abuse."
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and countered by claiming an investigation would violate the commission’s trade secrets until you were reminded that you're not supposed to have any.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and it only got worse when over thirty of your own staff members, past and present, told how you’d been pushing your own agenda to deregulate and eliminate more media ownership rules. They also brought up your way of dragging out meetings that don’t go your way and how you suppress agency studies when they don’t support your viewpoint.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and your friends in broadcasting are really going to miss your rubber stamp. They’ll also miss the eight-year -majority rule of the FCC along with Republican Deborah Tate whose term on the five-person commission is about to expire.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and just a couple of weeks back you announced plans on distributing free wireless Internet –with a proviso that would forbid pornography, whose definition would be up to you.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and - guess what? - the HCEC just released their long-awaited bipartisan 100 page in-depth report on your FCC, titled Deception and Distrust: The Federal Communications Commission under Chairman Kevin J. Martin. You can read it here.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and your official title may have been FCC Chairman – but your real title was bagman Numero Uno for big media.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and you had one of the best offices money could buy on Capitol Hill.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin during your FCC Chairmanship, wrong was the new right.
You’re Kevin Martin and you look like someone dropped a punch line on you and you were the joke.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and your career on Capitol Hill has gone from shakedown to takedown, and finally – breakdown.
You’re Boy Kevin Martin and you and your rubber stamp are outta here!